Terms and conditions? Mpango wa Kando fights back
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Posted January 24, 2011 by
Crazy Nairobian in Humor Articles
One IVY MUIGAI decided to reply to my article on Terms and conditions for my Mpango wa Kando. Well, right of reply applies so here goes her reply ....
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With regard to the article 'terms and conditions for my mpango wa kando' i hereby, as a prospective project, wish to extend my very own terms and conditions for my project financier.
1.The project financier must herein,and at all times, exhibit exemplary looks that allow for public appearances with the project, as she has an image to uphold.
2.The project financier will be expected to be in possession of what is known as 'ndovu kwa wallet'.
3.More importantly, he will have an exemplary home that contains a gym
4. The project financier will understand that the project is exposed to a high number of prospects each day of her life because of her striking looks and great personality, and therefore he must 'check himself before he wrecks himself'.
5.It must be known that the project is one who possesses an extremely high IQ, and therefore must not be treated as previous projects who exhibited a blonde nature.To this effect,the project financier will be expected to be conversant with current affairs and knowledge of all subjects. He must also know how to spell the words he user and to that effect,spelling tests will be taken.
6.The project financier will be expected to fight the uncontrollable urge to fall in love with the project, who possesses beauty and brains of the highest order, because what he owns will never be able to sustain the project's lifestyle throughout her life.
7.The project will not, and i repeat, will not, condone positions copied from scenes in 'blue movies'. A higher level of creativity and satisfaction therefore must be provided by the project financier.
8.The project financier will need to be aware of the fact that if he introduces his project to his friends who are richer and better looking than himself, the project will 'move house' and he will be immediately forgotten.
9.The project expects to laugh AT ALL TIMES and therefore the project financier must have an extremely high sense of humor. Repeated jokes will lead to the termination of the arrangement.
10.The project financier must always be fresh when planning to see the project.He is never to exhibit sweat and should therefore shower twice a day, especially before he puts on deo and cologne. Moreover, chest hairs must be shaven and a six pack must be attained for the project to admire as she so wishes. 'Mazguembes' of a terrible size cannot be accepted.
Now where is that project financier?
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