Types of Underwear

Posted April 20, 2011 by Crazy Nairobian in Humor Articles
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After reading comments in a heated discussion on a certain site about what type of underwear is the best, I have compiled the following types. The default type is one we will call Msupa. These are those nice Boxers, briefs, thongs or panties which are made of cotton and were NEW when you bought them. Yes. I Insist. New! The rest are as follows ...

1) Senoir Citizen: This is an underpant with a few years job experience (second hand underpants) and with several high profile referees or previous owners if you may. The owner is most possibly nuts! And a miser.

2) Sambaza: These are hand me downs from older brothers and/or sisters. They have also seen better days. The owner is most possibly young. And disgruntled.

3) Someni Vijana: These come in a box of three for a hundred and fifty. The owner is normally on a tight shoe string budget thus mostly a student.

4) Okoa Jahazi: Any underpants bought on credit. Some of which are never paid for. The owner is most possibly still hiding from the under-wear dealer. Lend such people your money at your own peril.

5) City Hoppa - A.K.A Grandmother pants a.k.a Mothers Union. These are the old fashioned large ladies panties. They have very thick panty lines too. The owners can be seen with VPLs (Visible panty lines) along the streets.

6) Magana Flowers - Well, this is the self explanatory type. I still dont understand why ladies insist on wearing these flowered underpants. What does it say about the owner? The flowers are a tribute to the men who have perished while working down under.

7) Under 18 - This is an under-size one. The owner doesnt believe he/she is growing bigger and insists on defiling younger (read smaller) members of the underpant world. The owners can also be seen regulary adjusting the poor under-18s in public.

8) Peeping Tom - These are underpants with a few peep holes especially for men who want the old soldier down under to peep outside. Or people with seriously toxic farts that drill holes in the underwear.

9) G4S - This one is Stolen. By persons playing Ponyoka na Ngotha promotion. They realize they canot afford a nice one and decide to steal from friends, family or neighbors. The owners, while daring, are quite stupd and are mostly caught sooner or later.

10) My love - Well this is the one and only underpant owned by the Lone-Underpant-Club members of our community. Its washed at night, dried at night and worn every day. Why is it called my love. Well, coz every morning, they wake up and pick the ngotha while singing " My love, there's only you in my life!"

Any other you know? Let me hear them...


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Crazy Nairobian
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Sanely Insane.


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