My Aunt and Her Cat ...
Cats will soon start rioting. They will get out of our homes and pour onto the streets chanting Haki Yetu very soon. And I wont blame them if what I heard last weekend from my cousin is anything to go by. If anything, I will join them in saying - ningeomba serikali iwasaidie. Why? Well the events of this past weekend left me baffled. My aunt beat her cat senseless simply because it chased, caught and attempted to eat a rat.
On hearing this, I smiled sheepishly because that (I believe) is what I thought cats do. Call me stupid but I believe cats are SUPPOSED to chase, catch and eat mice. Thats just nature. If anything, that was the reason why they were domesticated in the first place. To chase, catch and eat mice. Well, maybe except for Egypt where Cats were considered gods but I wont delve into it now. Not from people who made Children of Israel work in Pyramid schemes- pun intended.
When I was young, we used to chase away cats from our farm that failed in their duty of catching mice. Other more qualified cats were recruited into our homestead to take on the neglected duties of chasing and catching mice. But times are changing now. Cats are getting a beating for attempting to eat mice. What next, dogs being beaten for biting thieves? Will they instead get lessons on how to press the panic button or call 911 to fit into our "cool ways" of the 21st century? May be even chicken aren't supposed to lay eggs. Maybe they should device a way for them to go shopping for eggs from other birds and bring them home before the cane heads for their backsides.
Domestic animals should thus be warned. My aunt (and many others) are out to stamp out those uncool natural instincts you have. A few years with her and dogs will be requesting thieves to leave the premises quietly before they call 911; and rats will be opening the fridge door to get cheese as the cat helplessly watches as the rats laugh and taunt them with lines like, "Dare you chase me or try to eat me and your master will beat you up, punk!"
That may be what will be happening soon.
For now, somewhere in this country, is a very sad (and confused) cat. The poor animal was simply following its natural instincts and as it found out, natural is no longer cool. And to teach it new ways, my aunt then proceeded to buy some beef for the animal to last a few days. Sort of to let it know that eating rats is uncool and beef is the way to go.
