25 Rules: Life, love, living....

Posted October 16, 2011 by Crazy Nairobian in Humor Articles
Image Alt

I woke up on Sunday morning and started wondering what to do considering I was up at six o'clock on a cold freezing morning. And I decided to do something I very rarely do. Share a piece of myself. And considering I have chosen to remain anonymous for the last three years, it is something I very rarely do.

And so I tweeted my 25 rules of life that I use to govern everything I do and I promised to put them up in a post for the people who said they missed some of them. I am not perfect and I cannot claim I follow them perfectly. But I try my best.

Rule #1: I tell it like it is. Hate me, like me but thats just me.

Rule #2: I dont sleep with people with feelings for me who am not dating. Been stalked enough in life.

Rule #3: My house. My rules. Dont like em, get the fuck out.

Rule #4: I will always go out of my way to help those who deserve my help.

Rule #5: I cannot date a woman who doesn't know how to cook. I cant give anyone the chance to torture my heart AND my stomach.

Rule #6: I dont give advice to people who seek it when they have already decided. Am not a rubberstamp.

Rule #7: Never take sides during a fight involving two people who are in love. You'll always be left in the middle. Alone.

Rule #8: I dont sleep with strangers. No matter how good they are or how drank I am.

Rule #9: If you pretend you aint seeing me, I'll pretend I dont know you.

Rule #10: I dont do short term big buck business deals. They ALWAYS fuck you up. Been there done that.

Rule #11: Beauty doesn't move me unless its backed by brains AND self-confidence.

Rule #12: If I gotta cheat, she has to be REALLY worth it. Yeah, I said it.

Rule #13: No one ever breaks your heart without your permission. I repeat that to myself whenever I find myself asking WHY.

Rule #14: People will use you. No one will EVER come to you with an idea so that you can use them. They wanna use you.

Rule #15: I give you my trust for free once. Break it and you will know the pain of earning it.

Rule #16: I rarely kiss ass. And when I kiss yours, am merely teaching you how to. Coz you'll be kissing mine soon enough.

Rule #17: Never approach a girl when she is in a group of her friends. Ever. You'll fail 9/10 times.

Rule #18: Anyone who has ever dated any of my friends is a no go zone. No matter how short a time they dated.

Rule #19: Disrespecting parents is a no no. Irrespective. Whatever happens, let the burden be on them, never you.

Rule #20: I always take a cab after drinking. My friends think am nuts over this one.

Rule #21: The moment you start checking everyting your lover does, you have opened the door for them to leave.

Rule #22: If am paying you to do a job, you better do it my way. We will do it your way when you start paying me.

Rule #23: When I date someone I give one very good chance. I do EVERYTHING to make it work but its only ONE chance.

Rule #24: I dont sleep with heartbroken women. My bed isn't a crying zone.

Rule #25: I dont break my rules. I'll break your bones before I break my rules.


Recommended For You »

About the Author

Crazy Nairobian
Author Image

Sanely Insane.


Your Comments



blog comments powered by Disqus