Yes, I want to sound insensitive
I will start supporting gay people when I meet one of them with a Tshirt that says, "I support straight people." That is a tweet I posted yesterday evening and which resulted in a long email from a very irritated and (presumably) gay guy.
He started off by telling me that he thought a "forward-thinking" person like me should support gay people. He went on to say it was "insensitive" to gay people and that if I was "gay for a day I'd know what they went through in a society that does not support them."
Not to mention he threw me a few thinly insulated insults among other strong words and strongly worded phrases. He then ended the email by saying, in caps, "FUCK YOU!" (and -as I imagined it - rolling his eyes)
I did not reply mostly because I was laughing too damn hard. So let me address him here.
Dude, YOU. REALLY. NEED. TO. GET. LAID!
Let me start off by saying I am a very liberal person which means I dont give a hoot if you are straight or gay. Or if you like eating from both plates for that matter and whatever else tickles your sexual fancy. I also really dont care if a goat is what gives you sexual healing. Or a dog, donkey, chicken, pig, neighbor's chihuahua or any other animals just in case they also get offended for lack of a mention and support from a "forward-thinking" person like me. To which of course leads them to resort to writing me strongly worded emails. So yes, I really dont care what you play with under covers - human or animal. Although I think we need to draw the line at crocodiles because that is just sick. Especially if the crocodile likes it. And then wants to come on top.
Moving on ...
My problem comes with the call for support.
How the hell am I supposed to SUPPORT you?
By holding your partner in position?
You do realize that updating my status that "I support gay people" or wearing a tshirt in that respect is just as useful to you as a condom in a convent. Or my favorite ... as useful as a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest. It only helps you as much as that bottle of juice in your fridge helps you when you are 100 kms away dying of thirst.
Support? Hmmmm. My support does not improve your chances of getting some at the remotest level or the quality of the "some" that you are getting. It is not like my declaration for support will make a lonely cute gay guy somewhere come and celebrate with you. And am sure you may of course want to ask - where I am going with this?
Well, I dont need support to be straight. I suggest you also stop seeking support to be gay. It is not a disability or a weakness so I dont get where the support thing comes in. If you are gay, be gay the best way you know how. Dont look at me for support because I dont know the first thing about being gay the same way you dont know the first thing about being straight.
So I hope we understand each other. Your sexual life is YOUR BUSINESS. Whether you pack you cargo in Kim Kardashian, the neighborhood hooker, your house-boy's rear or wherever. Its your problem. I dont give a hoot provided there is consent from both parties. If it is immoral or breaks whatever law, thats a problem between you and your maker. I dont care.
Simply put, stop expecting my support or sympathy on matters sexual. If it was a hospital bill fundrasing I refused to support that you were whining about, I would understand. And even then, my support would also purely be my call. May be then I can allow you the chance to whine about expecting someone who is as "forward-thinking" as me to support you. Not that I'd listen by the way because even that is my call.
However, if you are whinning because I did not fall over myself as I dived into the debate to endorse the preferred destination of your dick, that is YOUR problem. Have I been insensitive? Yes. Harsh? May be. Forward thinking? Well, that you already discarded. But that has not stopped you from being gay now has it? Live your life the best way you know how without expecting cheers, acclamation and confetti for your actions.
And lastly, while hoping you dont take it seriously and come knocking on my door, let me return the favor and say ... Fuck You too!