Good Morning Crass - Twitter 101
1. Get rid of the egg. People are afraid of eggs. You may hatch into a snake
2. Would you walk up to a stranger and beg them to follow you? Weird, huh. Thats what it feels like when you beg ppl her
3. If #FF was a child, many tweeps would be paedophiles. Most abused hashtag ever. Learn how it works.
4. #Hashtags #dont #help #you #earn #more #bonga #points. Use them sparingly
5. Its fun to have a picture of ur boobies as ur avi to attract followers. Dont do this if you are male or aged above 40
6. If your IQ is a single digit, stay away from tweefs. You'll get slaughtered. Actually stay away from twitter altogether
7. Be careful who and what you DM. DMs platform ya twitter ni ya mabati. Sometimes it leaks.
8. Spelling mistakes are not a small thing on twitter. I however hope grammar nazis look as good as they spell
9. Kenya ina wenyewe. Ditto for twitter. Learn how tweeps work before you do something that'll make run back to Facebook
10. You should only whine about what people tweet if hitting the unfollow button gives you herpes
11. Moron- Person who steals 140 characters- mostly less- jus to look cool to strangers
12. Dont jump into a tweef jus to look cool. You will need a kamusi for the insults thrown at you. And a new handle
13. If you twEeT xamding lyK dis you need to germinate first before we can discuss growing up
14. Maswali za clinic peleka kwa jaguar avukishe border. If you can tweet, you can google
15. If you throw a tantrum coz of being unfollowed by strangers, I wonder how you handle being dumped.
Have an awesome twime ;-)
