Who let the turds out? Oh sorry, thats GEMA and KAMATUSA
Turd. The dictionary defines turd as a lump of excrement or generally, a log-shaped piece of shit. Its one of the three product of Mathutha Industries which is known to produce three products that are actually the best examples of the three states of matter. Everyone assumes the bigger the thutha, the bigger the turds which is mostly not the case as a story by one of my friends demonstrated. He told me that he realized he had grown up because of a turd. Yes! A piece of shit is what made it dawn on him that he is no longer a child.
How?
Well, he once took a shit in his grandmas garden. Little did he know his grandma, while walking around the farm, would find it by way of her foot getting introduced to the soft stuff very rudely. She felt it smudge onto the sole of her feet and wiggle through the gaps between toes, much to her chagrin.
Angry, she made her way to the homestead. Everyone was siting outside and she took that opportunity express her disgust. She demanded to know who took a shit in the shamba. Everyone stared at the kids. That is when she dropped the bombshell. She said it wasn't a kid. The sheer enormous size of the turd undeniably betrayed the culprit as a grown up!
My friend, at that moment ... and although he was twelve, learnt he was no longer a kid. He sat as the adults were handed a dressing down with a hard-hittting talk about how to behave like grown-ups. He definitely enjoyed seeing someone else get blamed for his actions but deep down, he knew he could NEVER AGAIN take a shit in his grandmothers garden, or any other garden for that matter, with the excuse that he was a kid.
And Kenyans should know they are no longer political kids. We have been through four multi-party elections. Someone who was born during the first general election turns twenty this year. Tribal based political choices must go. That is a kids turd. It is allowed when you are a kid. PEV was however the time Kenyans took a shit in grandmas shamba. And thanks to efforts of the international community (our grandma in this case) we were given the chance to realize we are no longer kids. They blamed the grown-ups (our leaders) but we did not really take the time to realize it was us. It was Kenyans who demonstrated, rioted, threw stones, destroyed property and killed each other. And we sat as the leaders got blamed. It was you and me that will have voted along tribal lines and protected our choices either secretly, quietly, vocally or violently.
That 2007 PEV turd was ours and it should serve to show us that we are no longer kids.
Now the leaders are aligning themselves. For them, its political survival. But when we eat their bull shit and dunk another PEV turd in the shamba, will we blame bad leadership? Take Gema, Kamatusa and other tribal groups. When I think about them I compare them to a collection of turds from drunk friends. You know, when people get really drunk and decide to do outrageous things, like do a turds fundraiser to see who can contribute the largest turd.
The result is most obviously a pile of shit. And these turds have been deciding which turd should be guiding them and I believe many turds will follow. Tribes are great. They have deep beautiful culture that serve to give us identity and a heritage to be proud of. What infuriates me is negative ethnicity. Soon we will be going to elections. Let me just hope Kenyans wont leave another giant turd in the farm and sit and watch as the blame hits the grown-ups!
