Letter From Mars To Venus
Greetings. The last meeting we had did not go well, you representatives walked away in protest saying that us Martians are interested in only one thing.
Our proposal is to hold a convention at a neutral place. Let us all come back to earth and make sense of the conflicts that might be.
At this convention we, the Martians will respond to the title ‘man’ and you our dear counterparts from Venus will go by the title ‘woman’, in plural the two will go by ‘men’ and ‘women’ respectively. We go by ‘man’ as we would like to keep it simple and easy to remember. We propose woman as we admit that you are not very different from us, only more WOnderful in build, hence, WOman. Should you find it acceptable the venue and titles so proposed, we would like to table the 1st issue of concern and that which from all other sprout.
What do men really want?
That is an issue that has been debated over and over again and in the last meeting we had we put our argument somewhat erroneously and it could be argued it was even insultive. But we stand by that decision what we expect of you is brain.
That is all. Really. We had previously made look like you do not have it but that was in bad taste and we send our sincerest apologies.
We just have a problem with how a larger part of your population has resulted to cheap antics like crying and using their beauty and bodies to win arguments, we cannot emphasize enough that crying is blackmail and using the body is just an insult to intelligence.
Again a larger of your population in the same context thinks that it doesn’t have to think as long as it is beautiful. When we cannot maintain a constructive conversation and when you don’t want to be reasonable in an argument, the activities that we can engage in with you is reduced to a promiscuous few.
Brains have always come before beauty on the parameters used to judge you our lovely counterparts from Venus. We have however kept these from you lest you feign intelligence to get into our pants.
But our intentions have been misunderstood, our ideals molested to a point of no recognition, a total disconnect from the intended.
We will give you the answers to the test.
• Do not hold back argument,
• Speak your mind, not your hormones
• Do not cry,
• Don’t go by everything we say,
• Do not cry,
• Leave crying out of the arguments and discussions,
• Have an opinion of yourself, but let be founded in easily traceable facts and theories not controversial or biased, learn to listen and learn to trust more.
• Let us know when we are wrong as we so often are.
• Guard your self-esteem,
• Telling your girlfriend your problems but not us does not help us change; it only further propagates the unfounded misconception that man is the problem.
• Last but not least, no tear
However we only have a problem with a part of the population while we applaud those that have kept true to what it actually means to be WOman.
We proposed the meeting and the venue and you can propose a time and an alternate venue but for us Martians it would be better to meet at a neutral venue, let’s come back to earth.
Ministry of universal relations